I'm in Hawaii Standup Paddle Surfing ...
singing karaoke and “talking story” with my friends. That’s 2 of my “S” activities and it just occurred to me that “talking Story” could be an“S” activity too! And in Hawaii, no less, where I feel so much at home!
I have "ocean" friends when I’m surfing; I have "island" friends with whom I spend the evenings for gatherings, karaoke, eating ono food and “talking story.” Even after a six month gap, I show up and it's as if I never left.
With Josh, an ocean friend and surfer on the Beach at Waikiki.
With Randy, Kris & Natori, island friends on Oahu.
My experience here reminds me of one of my oldest and dearest friends. I met her in my senior year in High School in Alexandria, Virginia. I came to this school late in my sophomore year. Most kids in the school had known each other since kindergarten. With all my moving in my youth, spending extended school years with the same group of people was a foreign concept. Naturally, I did not fit in anywhere.
I thought getting involved was the answer to getting to know people and making friends. Despite joining many clubs, taking on leadership positions in several clubs, being part of the student government, involved in two honor societies, participating in special leadership programs, I never fit in anywhere. I knew kids from every group: student government, cheerleaders, athletes, academics, auto workshop, and even drug addicts. I tutored. Heck, I was even the Prom Chairperson. But none of that mattered. I knew a lot of people but I did not develop temporary, much less lasting, relationships. I was never getting into any inner circle of friends that had existed over many years. But it was different with Robin.
We sat next to each other in our senior comp & grammer class. Robin was one of the “POPULAR” gals, smart and well-poised. I don’t even remember how it happened because, after all these years, how it began really isn’t important. I just know that we became the best of friends that year. Our friendship was built on something unique and special. I was a bit “different.” Maybe it was the inside parts of HER different from popular, smart and well-poised, on which we connected. After high school graduation, I didn’t see Robin for several years. When we met again in Washington DC, it was as if no time had passed. We started up our conversation as if we had never been apart. It was then another 10+ years before I saw her again. And again, we started up as if we had never been apart. I don’t speak with her, but I think of her often. Periodically a short note passes between us through cyberspace these days and I know she thinks of me often too.
It occurs to me though I probably should do more. Or maybe my friendship with Robin and our effortless reconnection is uniquely ours and nothing else needs to be done. I don’t know. I just know that she is my only high school friend and I’m grateful that she came into my life when she did.
And obviously, I was sporting a real 80's look back in the 80's. I can't believe I'm putting this out on my blog! But note how poised Robin still looks. She always has and always will.
TODAY’S HOW TO
Apparently the idea of making friends and keeping friends is a big deal and impacts our physical health. Who knew? A professor of psychiatry at NYU Medical School has a complete BLOG (The Friendship Blog) on friendship and covers just about anything involving friends. Wish this had been around when I was growing up and living somewhere new every 2-3 years!
